Last Updated on April 13, 2017 by Marie Bautista
When I was growing up, I looked with wide eyes, with a mixture of fear and pity on the blind beggars on the street. My boy classmates made fun of a lame man and walked behind him imitating him.
My children went (one is still there and is on the second grade) to a progressive, inclusive school. My now-seventeen-year old girl was one of the school pioneers. And you know the beautiful thing? They are never surprised to see how different a special needs child is. In a United Nations Day presentation, the pre-schoolers danced along with their classmate who can’t stand or walk on his own (he had polio as a kid). The child had a chair to hold on to for support and he danced with his classmates, with a big big smile on his face (in other schools, they will just let the child stay on the sidelines) and an autistic child also danced with them. In another pre-school class, a blind girl danced to the beat with her classmates. In these beautiful kids’ eyes, all of them are the same. Mas prejudiced pa ang parents, I think. And I think this is what is missing in our society. We talk about unity, but we are actually segregating. As a society, we need more empathy and the ability to accept others for what they are.
Here is one of those “one-of-a-kind”, feel-good spam mail about this disabled boy named Shay:
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| A photo by digitalart via freedigitalphotos.net |
At a
fundraising dinner for a school that serves children with learning
disabilities, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would
never be forgotten by all present. After
extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question:
“When not
interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does, is done with
perfection.
interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does, is done with
perfection.
Yet my son,
Shay, cannot learn things as other children do.
He cannot understand things as other children do.
Shay, cannot learn things as other children do.
He cannot understand things as other children do.
Where is the
natural order of things in my son?”
natural order of things in my son?”
Where is the
natural order of things in my son?”
natural order of things in my son?”
The audience
was stilled by the query.
was stilled by the query.
The father
continued. “I believe that when a child
like Shay, who was mentally and physically disabled comes into the world, an
opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the
way other people treat that child.”
continued. “I believe that when a child
like Shay, who was mentally and physically disabled comes into the world, an
opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the
way other people treat that child.”
Then he told
the following story:
the following story:
“Shay and I had
walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball.
walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball.
Shay asked, “Do
you think they’ll let me play?”
you think they’ll let me play?”
I knew that
most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but as a
father I also understood that if my
son were allowed to play, it would give him a much needed sense of belonging
and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.
most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but as a
father I also understood that if my
son were allowed to play, it would give him a much needed sense of belonging
and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.
I approached
one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play.
one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play.
The boy looked
around for guidance and said, “We’re losing by six runs and the game is in the
eight inning. I guess he can be on our
team and we’ll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.”
around for guidance and said, “We’re losing by six runs and the game is in the
eight inning. I guess he can be on our
team and we’ll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.”
Shay struggled
over to the team’s bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt…
over to the team’s bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt…
I watched with
a small tear in my eye and warmth in my heart.
The boys saw my joy at my son being accepted.
a small tear in my eye and warmth in my heart.
The boys saw my joy at my son being accepted.
In the bottom
of the eighth inning, Shay’s team scored a few runs but was still behind by
three.
of the eighth inning, Shay’s team scored a few runs but was still behind by
three.
In the top of
the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was
obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear
to ear as I waved to him from the stands.
the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was
obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear
to ear as I waved to him from the stands.
In the bottom
of the ninth inning, Shay’s team scored again.
Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was
on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.
of the ninth inning, Shay’s team scored again.
Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was
on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.
At this
juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game?
juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game?
Surprisingly,
Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew
that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn’t even know how to hold the
bat properly, much less connect with the ball.
Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew
that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn’t even know how to hold the
bat properly, much less connect with the ball.
However, as
Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was
putting winning aside for this moment in Shay’s life, moved in a few steps to
lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact.
Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was
putting winning aside for this moment in Shay’s life, moved in a few steps to
lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact.
The first pitch
came and Shay swung clumsily and missed.
came and Shay swung clumsily and missed.
The pitcher
again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay.
again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay.
As the pitch
came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the
pitcher.
came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the
pitcher.
The game would
now be over!
now be over!
The pitcher picked
up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first
baseman.
up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first
baseman.
Shay would have
been out and that would have been the end of the game.
been out and that would have been the end of the game.
Instead, the
pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman’s head, out of reach of all
team mates.
pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman’s head, out of reach of all
team mates.
Everyone from
the stands and both teams started yelling.
the stands and both teams started yelling.
“Shay, run to
first! Run to first!”
first! Run to first!”
Never in his
life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base.
life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base.
He scampered
down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.
down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.
Everyone
yelled.
yelled.
“Run to second,
run to second.”
run to second.”
Catching his
breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it
to the base.
breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it
to the base.
By the time
Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball. The smallest guy on their team who now had
his first chance to be the hero for his team.
Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball. The smallest guy on their team who now had
his first chance to be the hero for his team.
He could have
thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he also understood the
pitcher’s intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over
the third-baseman’s head.
thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he also understood the
pitcher’s intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over
the third-baseman’s head.
Shay ran toward
third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward
home.
third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward
home.
All were
screaming, “Shay, Shay, Shay! All the
Way Shay!
screaming, “Shay, Shay, Shay! All the
Way Shay!
Shay reached
third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the
direction of third base, and shouted, “Run to third! Shay, run to third!”
third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the
direction of third base, and shouted, “Run to third! Shay, run to third!”
As Shay rounded
third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet
screaming, “Shay, run home! Run home!”
third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet
screaming, “Shay, run home! Run home!”
Shay ran to
home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam
and won the game for his team.
home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam
and won the game for his team.
“That
day,” said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, “The boys
from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world.
day,” said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, “The boys
from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world.
Shay
didn’t make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten
being the hero and making me so happy, and coming home and seeing his mother
tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!”
didn’t make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten
being the hero and making me so happy, and coming home and seeing his mother
tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!”
This is a very touching post Marie because I have three kids with special needs and it is always challenge for my family when they are misunderstood by "limited" people that we have gotten used to it. As a mom I yearn for that day when these kids of mine live to be independent and contribute to the society that sometimes do not understand them to the point of being harsh. Still I am thankful that they are functioning,healthy and accepted by some. That for me is enough.
Blessings!
I love how my children and their classmates accept children who are differently-abled. When my daughter was in the sixth grade, they did a UN day presentation representing Europe. I rented a dress fit for a princess and she looked beautiful. but you know what was more beautiful, she danced with a special-needs classmate. Later I saw a letter from a boy in her class crushing on her telling her how disappointed he was that he was not able to dance with her.when I asked her if it was her teacher who changed her partner! she said she chose the special needs boy because the other girls cannot dance with him moving and jerking all over. She said his extra movements did not bother her and he really dances well and that he deserves to be onstage too.
I can relate to this! After my injury I felt anxious because when I went to the mall, everyone was gawking at me. Then I realized that I should get used to it and dismiss it because going out makes me happy. Now, I smile back when I see people looking at me.