Being a mom is one of the best things you can ever be. It’s full of joy and laughter, and you have this tiny human that you love unconditionally. It is also a full-time job of changing diapers, battling through tantrums and teaching your kids not to do things like sticking a fork in a power socket. That’s why it is so important to have space just for you, where you can relax and have some ‘me’ time.
Let’s focus on the most important aspect; the bed. The only way you are going to have a good night’s sleep and feel completely relaxed is if your bed is just right. Start with the mattress – finding the right one isn’t as straightforward as pointing at random in a catalogue. Do the research and figure out the type of support you need, check out this leesa review to know what to look for.
Now let’s move on the covers. Get the right tog for your climate. You don’t need a thick duvet (no matter how soft it is) if you’re going to melt at night. The same with pillows, don’t pile them up if it’s hot at night – plus it’s bad for your neck. Have a couple of pillows tops to sleep with, then pile the bed up with cushions for daytime relaxing.
Make sure you hand black-out blinds or curtains. If you have the morning sun streaming in at 5 am, then you’ll wake up at 5 am. Or it will pull you out of your REM sleep, and you won’t feel rested at all. Avoiding light at night is one of the tricks we do, and that is wired into our brains, that signals our bodies that it’s time to sleep. Disrupting that by having the street lamp glaring through the window all night won’t do you any good. Read this article on how light can affect your sleep.
If you spend your days cleaning up poop and throw up, then having a relaxing space filled with the blissful scent of your favourite candle will be nothing short of bliss. Different smells can help us to relax – chamomile and lavender are the top contenders for the most relaxing scent, but if you prefer something else like juniper or vanilla, then use that. You can train your body into relaxing quicker over time by using the same atmosphere. If you use the same scent and sit in the same position, your body recognises this as time to relax and unwind.
Your room needs to be clutter-free for optimum relaxation. Having a messy or a full room distracts the eye and fills the mind. You can use some savvy storage ideas to help keep the clutter at bay; use a shoe storage bag in the closet for belts, ties and even hair things. You can get a floor to ceiling shoe rack installed to keep your shoes organized and not throw in the bottom of the closet. Try and keep any laundry out of the bedroom, or just remove it when you are going for your relaxation time.
Like the lights, technology distracts the mind. When relaxing try and keep the room a tech-free zone. If you’re using your phone for music, then put on a playlist and put your phone face down away from you. The temptation to just check Facebook or Twitter can be hard to resist. But the seemingly mindless scrolling is very mindful; your brain is still trying to pick up all the information, and your eyes are still staring at a screen.
At night, set your alarms and put your phone screen down away from you. Avoid looking at a screen before going to sleep, try reading or doing a crossword before bed, this allows the information grabbing part of your mind to settle down, and the rest to start to fall asleep.
To keep the routine going, try and have a set time each day to have some relaxation time. This might be when your baby is napping, or after you’ve tucked the kids up in bed. Just take half an hour to let yourself enjoy your sanctuary. With older kids, tell them that you are having some ‘mommy time’ and that they don’t need to get you unless it’s an emergency – which you’ll be listening out for anyway. Even if you’re not meditating, use the time to do something you don’t normally get to, like painting your nails or wearing a face mask. Little pamper sessions that take care of you as much as you take care of everyone else.